Pokerama-rama! Now with more beer!

Beer, brewing and poker, with possibly some inane drivel on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

About a year ago, Hank had an excellent post detailing different motivations people have for playing poker. I read the entry a few times, nodding along in agreement with everything he had to say, yet I still didn't understand what my real motivation for playing was. I don't think I have my exact reasons pinned down today, either, and at this rate, I probably never will.

It's absolutely not the money, because any little amount that I've made playing has stayed a part of my bankroll and doesn't really belong to me. It's not for fame, that's for sure. If there's one thing that I've learned over the past year of playing, it's that the chances of me becoming a WCP are unbelievably minute. That's fine with me, too, because I'm not one to seek out the limelight. Not that I've ever had that before, but I can imagine what it would be like if I did, and it's deer-caught-in-headlights frightening.

I could go on forever detailing what aren't reasons behind my poker fascination, but that's not why I'm writing this entry. And I'm a little worried that I'd never come up with any real, concrete reasons why I stick around a game that is an emotional rollercoaster much of the time. So, I'm just going to lie to myself and decide that there has to be a few reasons in this world for me to keep playing.
A little denial never hurt anyone, did it? That's what I thought. What those reasons are, I'll have to find some day, I suppose.

I read this via iggy's entry and it got me to thinking about the blogging phenomenon, and why I choose to blog. Specifically, my reasons to blog about poker. Yes, I know that thinking, for me, is a sure path to what's known in the medical business as "brain hurt", but that's a chance I'm willing to take.

Why do I blog about poker?

Is it because I believe that I'm a foremost authority in poker theory, and that by writing, I'm providing some great service to my readership?

Sadly, no. I wish that insight was my forte, but I'm woefully unqualified to be writing anything of that nature, and if I did, you can bet that most of the information would be erroneous and unintentionally comical. If anyone is coming to my site to "learn", the only thing that I could suggest to them is a frontal lobotomy.

Well, surely it's because my poker "career" is an exciting tale that must be told, right?

Wrong. If anything, my progression is moving along in baby-steps--two small steps forward, one tilt backward, and a whoops, just fell on my ass. I'm not crushing the fish on a nightly basis, I've never even made a final table in a MTT, and there is absolutely nothing interesting in any of my sessions. Some people that are technical, like Chris, can write in that voice and make it interesting. I cannot. Believe me, I've tried to write that way, and the entries even bore the diapers off of me. The only reason for me to ever take that angle is so everyone else can feel better about their game.

If you don't write because you're qualified, or an interesting read, you must be writing only for yourself?

If nobody, and I mean nobody, ever read anything I've ever written, I would've quit writing. That's what paper journals are for. Also, if I had to get all my poker knowledge out of a book, it would've been tough to stick with as long as I have. There's a give-and-take that comes along with this journal, and moreso with the community as a whole. As much as I think I'd be terrible in the limelight, I do like being the center of attention from time to time. I am an attention whore. There, I said it. Are you happy now? I like getting feedback, and it's the best positive reinforcement a guy like me could ever get. I write something, somebody responds. Pavlov rings a bell--the dogs salivate. Outlook Express rings like a bell--I salivate.

I love to write, but I don't consider myself a writer. I don't have the background that many of the more prolific writers in this community have, and in fact, I'd go so far as to say that I have no background at all. That doesn't stop me from striving to get better, though.

For me, there's a direct correlation between poker and writing. Many of you have been doing both for a very long time, whereas I'm a relative newborn. I don't have the depth in either to consider myself an expert by any stretch of the imagination, but as I add skill in one discipline, I notice skill in the other growing as well.

It's this symbiosis that keeps me going--I study poker so that I'll have something to write about, and in turn, it's the writing that keeps me interested in the game.


At 3:16 PM, Blogger Dr. Pauly said...

Chad, blogging is great practice for you as a writer. It kinda forces you to write a few times a week, whether you want to or not. It's good exercise. I encourage you to write more...

At 3:16 PM, Blogger Felicia :) said...

Candid post, I like that :)

Weird, I thought from the first time I played poker that I would be great. I just knew in a dozen years I would be at the top. I haven't changed my mind, although I am not on the fast track, like lots of the younger players.

I also always said Glenn would one day be better than me. Maybe not in tourneys, but in cash games. I still stand by that first instinct.

Someday you might feel differently about yourself. Malmuth has always said that weak/tight players have the best chance of becoming WCP.

At 3:20 PM, Blogger Drizztdj said...

Excellent post Chad! No final tables in a MTT yet? Very surprising.

That will give you something to shoot for this year, maybe we'll have to tackle a MTT down at canterbury together :)

At 3:23 PM, Blogger Drizztdj said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 4:56 PM, Blogger Ignatious said...

another damn good post, chad. i could fill up this entire comment box thingy with my thoughts but i think i'm gonna just gonna say kudos and be done with it.


At 7:13 AM, Blogger Ryan said...

Even though I just started reading your blog not too long ago, your writing style is among the best out there. It's very lightly written, and reads very conversationally. There's also only a couple of blogs that I read just for poker theory and strategy. Most are just to read about experiences similar to what I am going through and how the writers handled them.

At 11:01 PM, Blogger StudioGlyphic said...

I agree with Ryan. I like you writing style. So if you have to keep playing poker in order to write, keep playing poker.

At 10:24 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The company I work for - Crash and Sue's - is holding a texas hold'em tourney and we need dealers.

If there are any dealers out there who would like to make some easy, fun cash once a week for however long this event will go... PLEASE call ASAP 612.338.7947
- minneapolis, MN area
- ask for Donna or Nicole
- Tourney starts in Feb.2005 - you need to call now.

At 11:17 AM, Blogger John-Paul said...

Nice post Chad. Very insightful. Come to think of it, I'm not quite sure why I write... but your post is pushing me to ponder that thought.


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